A letter from Z to the disgusting dog!
You are my neighbor’s dog. You are a very ugly and tinny creature. By all means you are gross.I simply hate you. Don’t get me wrong! I’m an animal lover. You are the ONLY dog I hate. You are just disgusting. When ever we take the same elevator you bark at me. You are little but you can bark like a big dog. I feel like some day you will attack me and damage my precious face. Remember! A month ago I had had a great day at work. I got our building and you were at the lobby with your cutie owner (what a stud! YUM!) In the freaking elevator you started barking at me again! We couldn’t get you shut up! You! Gross thing were off the hook! I got so stressed out. I went home and opened up a bottle of pinot grigio. I got myself drunk! My partner got mad at me because I had so much to drink. It was your fucking fault! I wasn't going to drink at all that nite. Why are you barking at me so much? Do you hate me or do you have feelings for me? What is wrong with you WHORE?! You are behind disgusting! Couple weeks ago I was taking a pleasant walk by the river. You were at doggie area. Your cutie owner (yummy!!!) was flirting with the other dog owner and was not looking at you. You let that big hung German Shepherd fuck you. Yeah! He inserted his big penis in you! You didn’t even scream. You took it all the way in! Yes! You were penetrated terribly! I thought it was your end. I said myself “ That little shit was not going to make it this time. That hung will tear him apart. Thank u! hunky German!” Right after that you, I & your delish owner took the same elevator again (with my luck!!) OH BOY! You were like nothing happened. You barked at me like a bag lady and tried to attack me. As if it wasn’t bad enough you sat down, spread your legs out, bended over & started licking your freshly fucked ass with your itty-bitty tongue. GROSS! Buddy! I just want let you know. Your ass stinks. I mean REALLY stinks. Like the combination of shit and poppers. Why do you smell so horrible?
Do you secretly sniff your owner’s poppers? But two days ago a miracle happened. You didn’t bark at me in the elevator. I asked your hottie owner (BTW I would do your owner in the elevator anytime) “Is she sick?” He said flirtatiously “Yes” (BTW I think your owner has feelings for me too. JEALOUS?!!) I was so happy. I want you to be sick all the time. In fact if you leave me alone and get out of my life, I would be so happy. Do me a favor & die! I hope you are not taking all those personally. We just didn’t click! (or you take it personally but I don’t give a shit!)Your neighbor Z (Z is the bitch)
Click here to read " Don't ever DUDE me again"
You missed a party! Memorial Day weekend in Miami
OMG! Even Ugly Betty was there! She forgot to wear her skirt! Betty! Be careful with Cellulitis!!
Strike a gross pose! Creative outfit! Matching American Apparel underwear and knee length socks! Anna Wintour must see this!
TITORIOUS! Obviuosly those dykes didn't have Victoria Secrets gift certificate! Although one of the dyke has killer abs! GO GIRL!
Charlie's Fags! Boy!!! In the middle one is like African American Pamela Anderson. Copper speedo is so out this year. Honey! you should have done gold. Yellow underwear? It is extremely stylish!
Shake It Girls! JLO will be so proud of you girls!
And the last is the best! TRANIEZILLA! Saggy boobies are very attractive! Vomitilicious! EeehhhWW!Click here to see "Ehhhww but hysterical!!!
Hey Mr itty-bitty Penis! Of course size matters!
Only 5% of the population need extra large condoms. GET OVER IT! Hooking up with a big schlong is very remote possibility. GET USED TO IT! Yes!! Size matters but you need to know how to handle itty-bitty penis too. Z did a extensive search for you. When you read this, you will know what to say Mr mini weiner!
2) Should we put triple condoms, so it will get thicker.
3) But you are an African American!! How could it be?! Well! Affirmative action is fierce! Let me blow you!
4) How about you use your hand
5) God! My horoscope said small things were going to surprise me today! Now I know what it meant
6) You've got to be kidding! Do you mind if I take a picture!
7) Poor thing! Let's pray together!
8) So, I mean, is this it? Do you think it'll ever get bigger?
9) Alright! I told you I was on a portion control diet. Gosh! not for that!
10) Is this candid camera? Where is the camera?
11) Eeehhw
w! It is like a little sardine12) Oh Honey! When did it shrink?! LOL
13) Have you ever considered to become female? I mean there won't be dramatic change.
Coming soon! How to handle a hung (horse like) LOL
Click here to read " A leather daddy's to do list"
Hello Summer by DJ Scooby!
WARNING! Please open the link in Internet Explorer to download
Finally! HELLO SUMMER arrived on Z's bog. LOVE LOVE this cd! Scooby did a great job! Masterpiece starts with a familiar song "HELLO" It is like a delightful surprise. Of course "Give it 2 me" is a very fresh and amazing remix. Z still can't believe Scooby got this remix that early. Z's fav is "Run the show" Kat Deluna. That song is Z's pier dance song. Another pier dance is "Fall" . Everybody will be dancing with this song no doubt. Shockingly Miley Cyrus " See you again" is really great one too. Obviously Ms teenage Genitalia got it right this time. And also Jordan Sparks " No air" is very upbeat and diva like. Z thinks Jordan Sparks is his fav. American Idol. Well! No need to keep going like this. You should download and listen this cd, you will be saying "Oh Boy! Z is right" Enjoy Boys!
HELLO SUMMER by DJ Scooby
OMG! Diesel Dykes gone wild!!! LOL
Well Well! Who said diesel dykes were boring. Here are bunch of pictures from lesbian week in P-town. Z blog reader Tom Ponti from Boston sent those hysterical pics to Z. BIG KISS goes to Tom. He deserved Z's tiara award too. GREAT JOB TOM! Let's take a look at those Messzillas! LOL
LOVE LOVE! Diesel dyke is showing her boobies to baby dykes! Piggylicious! How fun is that? Eeeehhww!
Of course beer bottles pops up in the picture. What did you expect cosmopolitans! Ms Dyke is apparently so thirsty. She is sucking beer like a big sponge!Big baby is going to burp a lot!
She is washing her chubby body with beer. Is that beer blast Mondays in P-town? BTW She looks very bloated. Girls! Rub mommy's tummy for luck. 
OH Baby! Ms Dyke is so proud! Crowd is so excited! Piggylicious! Honey! Honey! After all those beers! She'd better run to the bathroom. Well! Don't blame lesbians anymore. They are very fun!
**If you have blog-worthy pictures or stories, send to Z. If it fits to Z's bloglike these great pics, Z will definitely post them. You can email ILOVEZEREN@gmail.com
Click here to read "8 reasons to love lesbians"
Z got straight dudes turned on at the gym!
Hello Summer by DJ SCOOBY! Brand new cd! Z still can't believe DJ Scooby got new "GIVE IT TO ME" remix in advance. You know who is the singer. Of course the diva who is recent candy shop owner. LOL! Z listened this cd first time at the gym! Z felt like he was at pier dance! Amazing! He couldn't stop dancing! You will feel the same way! But Don't do that at the gym!! Because Z turned on straight people on! (with the little help of his skimpy pink gym short) Well! Music was great! He couldn't help it! It was Dj Scooby's fault! And those straight people liked the way Z danced and started fantasying about him!. Well! Z always says " Anus is the other vagina" LOL!
Labels:
joke
1 Say Something!!
Links to this post
Memorial Day weekend was so much FUN in Pines!
Well Well! Z finally posted Memorial Day weekend pics. Stop complaining bitches! Z knows all of you wanna be on the blog. Don't be a complaining whore!! Z is busy with these socializing and parties!! And also believe or not!!! Z is actually working too! What did you think?!! Z was heiress!! Anyway!! Here are pics of the most FUN Memorial Day weekend in Pines. Let's see which hotties were there.
Z & Dan-- Isn't he so handsome? Delissshh! He is so nice too. No need for an introduction for Dan. Who ever does Pines share knows him. If you don't know you'd better meet him!! HOT HOT!
Bill, Z & John-- Long time no see! Fun & popular couple were in FI. They also threw a small cocktail party for their good friends in their bay- view gorgoues house. Amazing house and company!!!Who wouldn't like them?
Z & Mario-- Housemates had so much fun last weekend together! Who knew Z & Mario would get along so well!! Even they did a red-theme for low tea. Z's shades matches Mario's hat, incase you are color blind!LOL! Boy!!! That Mario is a boy-magnet too!
Z & Michael-- This is Michael's debut on Z's blog. It is the first time but it won't be the last! Very cute pic!
Toby! Since Toys for Tots Z has not seen him. He is still HOT HOT!
Apparently! He worked out all winter.
Brian the bf, Rob, Mateus -- Rob & Brian the bf are friends since forever.Rob's hot bf joined the conversation too. Gossiping about Z??? OH NO!:):)
Two fashionistas are together. Victor & Z. LOVE LOVE Victor's shades! And also Notice! Victor is wearing Z's fav color pink in a sexy way.
Housemate Chris & Kevin-- Never miss a party! They'd better not!! Because they are Z's housemates!:):):)
Z & Tom-- Tom admits that he loves the music on Z's blog! Well! Is that only thing you like on Z's blog? Think again!!!! Next time Z's comment could be very bitchy!
Z & Wes-- Finally he is making Z's blog. Isn't he so cute!!!!
Mario & John-- Mario's friend John was not familiar with Z's blog. Hope he would not be scared! Yeah John! Blog is...... how do you call? Interesting! You are very lucky! You made the blog at first time! Do you know how many people are on the line! LOL
Housemate Chris & Richard-- Well Well! Z's good friend Richard was at the low tea with Chris! Z caught them whispering! Gossiping without Z!!! It is a MAJOR sin!!!
Matt & Z--- Well! Matt! Long time no see! Last time Z left you at low tea after almost one year Z found you at the low tea again. Haven't you even moved?? LOL Kidding!! He is a cutie!!
Boys!!! WARNING! Hotties are here! Don't get aroused! Pedro & Paul!Hot picture HUH?! Pedro made a surprise to Z and popped up in Pines . It is always GREAT to see him!
Z & Chris-- Another winter sleeper woke up for summer LOL! This is Chris's first share in Pines. Can't wait here his fun weekend stories! First year is always the BEST!
Gonzalo & Matthew-- It is their debut on Z's blog. Gonzalo is styling Z's red shade! This pic turned out very hot too! Yummy!
The last one is the hottest one! Hottie Brett is posing for Z's blog. Yummyy!So!! Can we get married elsewhere? Is it OK?
If we get married elsewhere, NY state will recognize our marriage.WOW! WOW! That means if Z & Brian the bf go to California ( after June17th) and get their marriage license, NY state will say them " Congrats husband & husband!!". Is it very HAPPY news? Well! Don't you think it reminds us little bit " Don't ask Don't tell". It is like saying " Don't do it here! Do it somewhere else". Why can't Manhattan gays get married in their state instead of going elsewhere? Is it too much to ask? It sounds little bit bizarre. It is not a disastrous news but it is not that great one either. "Don't mess in NY! Mess in other state! 
When you come back we will say it is OK!" Does that make sense to you? Well! Z must say it is an improvement. Obviously in this country gays should move forward step by step. Congrats Boys!! Our "out of state" marriage will be recognized in NY! BIG OH WOW! Z is really happy to hear that!-:):):):) Queers! It is time to run to bridal shop. No time to waste! We have a wedding to do. Now!! The most question is coming! Who will catch Z's bouquet? Remain to be seen!
Click here to read "I'm a gay male & I'm pregnant"
Ooooppps!
Coming Soon!
Great Memorial Day Weekend in Pines!
----------------------------
"10 hilarious MASTURBATION techniques" Hit on it!
Click here to read "DON'T DUDE ME AGAIN!!!"
Fleet Week at Pines
Fleet Week Sailors stopped by Pines last Friday! Well Those sailors were HOT HOT! "Don't Ask Don't Tell" What is that? Is this Japanese? 
Cute Sailors hit dance floor! They danced like there is no end!
Z's friend Tim & his housemate was one of them! HOT HUH!
Some sailors don't like to shave! Hopefully they won't smell too! LOL
Some sailors didn't even wanna go back! Come stud! Stay with Z! Yummmmyyy!God made me gay because he didn't have any other option!
Years ago while God was creating me, he looked at me and said “This little baby has very tinny bone structure and also little bit girlie. This skinny & adorable human can be neither male nor female. His feet are too big to be a woman. I’m going to make him homo” Well! God decided to make me queer that day. He was in a good mood. He gave me delicious and little bit malicious sense of humor. He also gave me great fashion sense and addiction to skin products. As the other gay males I got strong dedication to cock as well. Other than that I was created the same as hetero dudes. So even God created me equally compare to other heteros. How come I cannot get my equal rights and benefits as a normal human being. I simply don’t understand this!!! Is that because I have a skinny and smooth body unlike fatty heteros? Am I getting punished because I like shinny things? Or they think gays are not good persons. Well! I’m a good person!!!! I respect every law and pay my taxes. How about thieves, rapists and killers? If a thief or murderer was a hetero, he could get every single equal right, but I can’t!!!!! Is that because they are better person than me? Hell NOT! There are so many people think gays should not get married and get their equal rights. Who ever thinks like that I have one sentence to tell them “Even my willy is better than you” -:)
Click here to read " Cats lick their own ass!"
This blog will be open on Memorial Day!
Click here 2 read "Z's liquid diet diary"
Don't miss "The books you must have"
Scroll down for FOREVER SUMMER by DJ TimO . It is a masterpiece!!
Z wishes Ron a great birthday!
Z's runner-up bff Ron is celebrating his 40ish b-day this weekend. His big party will be on Sunday. Ron is having his party at his spectacular roof. Unfortunately Z is missing Ron's party. (Can't believe it!) Ron's great personality and witty sense of humor makes him an amazing friend. He is so fun to be with. It has been so long Z hasn't seen Ron (Hey Ron!!! Z is complaining here) Well! shit happens! Hopefully soon Z will celebrate Ron's b-day separately. Z wishes Ron happy b-day!!! BIG KISS from Z to Ron!
Pines is up & running
Last weekend finally Pines got some sun! Even though early of the season gay island was packed. Hot homos were everywhere. We didn't reach the speedo season yet but Studs were sexy in thick hoodies too. Low Tea & High Tea was packed. Well Honey! Pines is already up & running! 
Rick, Sean & Z--- LOVE LOVE this pic! Z looks little bit sleepy. Should we blame excessive vodka for that? LOL. Rick & Sean look sooo adorable! LOVE Sean's sweet face expression!:) And Anthony made a surprise and sneaked in the picture with his cute smile
Tony & Johnny-- Everyone is familiar with them from Z's blog. They did a great start for the season last weekend! They had so much at Sip & Twirl on Saturday nite ! Ooopps! No gossiping Z!
Eric , Z, Doug & Chris--- Socialite Eric wouldn't miss any Fire island weekend! Of course Doug too! It is Little Chris's first share on the island this year. He was the other one made a FUN start on the island last weekend! Satruday nite was busy for him. No names will be given! LOL!!! Z's blog is not a gossip site. LOL!
Well Well! Little Chris & little Johnny ! Z is starting a competition between them. It is called Project Pines. Do you think Johnny will keep his popularity or Chris will get more attention. Which cute & little stud will win the competion? Any comments?! Z will be the judge! Stay tuned!
Mario & Z--- Mario is Z's new housemate. OH BOY! Two meditarenians are in the same house. You can imagine the riot. He is so much FUN. Well boys! He is hot & single too! Who's going to get lucky this summer! Remain to be seen!
Brian the bf, Anthony, Ryan & Jack ---- Jack & Anthony is Ryan & Paul's new housemates. Z's sister house got all new housemates this year. No doubt! they are so much FUN. Z's cute bf Brian became a social butterfly recently. He was chatting with all island over the weekend.
Chris, Cartoon Chris, Richard & Eric--- Richard 's bff's Chris & Cartoon Chris were other familiar faces on the island. BOYS! You must check Cartoon Chris's web site http://www.itsthemichaels.com/
It is AMAZING. It is really well done. Richard & his new housemate Eric was having great time at the low tea as well. This picture turned out really cute too!
David & Richie--- They are Z's housemates. David is the newbie. Being Z's housemate got David under limelight automatically. He had no idea when he wanted to join our house. Who knew Z was important public figure! Well! David get used to it! You are doing share with gay media! LOL LOL!
Z & Anthony-- Even Anthony hated his pic. Z really liked it. So Anthony you made the blog finally! Stop complaining Anthony! Z can hear you! Your pic is adorable! 
Joe & Jason--- Well Well! It was Joe's first weekend on the island this season. Sure he had so much fun Saturday nite! ( AGAIN!No gossiping Z!!) Joe & Jason's pic is the other great one. OH BOY! Z knows how to take AMAZING pics! Fierce!!! 
Steve, Dan & Z--- Do you think seriously think, these would miss Pines! HELL NO! Needless both are Z's good friend! Looking forward to spending more time with them during summer! FUN FUN!
Ryan, Paul & Johnny--- GOOD old times! Trio re-united at the low tea! LOL! You can imagine the laughs about this comment! OOOoopps!
Well! Cutie David is with Z! Since David came back from long Thailand vacation, he wasn't around. Who knows what he was up to! It was great to see him! Hope Z will see him very soon! :)
And Chris & Ted! Boy! How many Chris does Z know?? So manyyy!!Canadians were in town! :):)
Well Well! Our good friends Mark & Tony came from Canada. We all went to a fun dinner. Wine & Italian carbs made everyone happy. All nite we talked about old days!!! Excessive wine makes people nostalgia apparently. Great group pic with Tony, Ryan, Z, Bob,Paul, Brian the bf, Mark & Joe
Joe , Mark & Brian the bf---All nite everyone was like this. BIG SMILE! Mark is the red head. He was one of the guest of honor!
Paul & Brian the bf--After a while everyone started giving Z's signature BIG KISS! Well They said this kiss was so much FUN! Welcome to Z's life! What a hardship! kissing hot boys for my blog! LOL
Ryan & Tony--- Tony is giving Ryan a BIG KISS. Well Tony! If you keep up the good work, you will get the Pines Party weekend at Ryan& Paul's Fire island mansion! LOL
Tony started taking pics too. Is Z getting spin-off blog??! GEE!
The last and the best! Z & Bob--- Bob tried to give Z a BIG KISS! Isn't this pic sooo cute!
Forever Summer by TimO
Well Well! New DJ TimO cd finally arrived to Z's blog! Today all day Z listened this fabulous cd. It is a masterpiece!! Start new hit Rihanna song! Mariah Carey "Touch my body" is amazing! Of course Don't miss Madonna" 4 Minutes"! Cindy Lauper " Same old fucking story" Well! That songs is so good! "Surrender Me" & "Club La La" are great summer songs! But Z's fave song is " Alright". Z loved that song instantly! This cd is very upbeat! It makes Z happy! Here you go! DJ TimO did it again!
Forever Summer by DJ TimO
1) Alright (Jonathan Peters Black Party Mix)- Jonathan Peters feat.Katreese Barne
2) Take A Bow (Tony Moran & Warren Rigg Encore Club Mix)- Rihanna 3) 4 Minutes (Peter Rauhofer Saves New York Mix)- Madonna feat.Justin Timberlake
4) Surrender Me (Tony Moran & Warren Rigg Hail The Divas Mix)- Debby Holiday
5) Same Old Fucking Story (Ralphi's Melodic Vox Remix)- Cyndi Lauper 6) Looking 4 Men (Abel Ho-ing Dub)- Rosabel feat. Tamara Wallace
7) Stamp Your Feet (Escape & Collucio Club Mix)- Donna Summer
8) Damaged (Tyler Nelson Dark Club Mix)- Danity Kane
9) Club La La (Jody den Broeder Club Vocal Mix)- Sirens
10) Don't You Wanna Be Mine (Extended Club Mix)- Denise Lopez
11) Touch My Body (Seamus Haji & Paul Emanuel Club Remix)- Mariah Carey
If chubby Perez Hilton blogs himself
Well Well! If Chubby Perez Hilton blogs himself, that would be just like this. Honestly! Z thinks Perez is quite funny. Chubby blogger was a bad-bad boy couple weeks ago. He outed supposedly closeted actor (you know who). Z doesn't even wanna mention actor's name here. Z strongly believes, outing a gay guy is not right thing to do (especially by another gay guy). Getting out of closet is extremely painful process for anyone and it should be up to closeted person.Perez was bad-bad boy so Z blogs Perez Z way. Z gave him bad boy red nose award. OH! One suggestion to Perez from Z. He should register http://www.gaychubbydating.com/ so he start getting sexual intercourse again! LOL
Click here 2 read " I'm a gay male & I'm pregnant"
